About a week later, Morwen was back in the remainders bookshop – this time searching for a non-glitter, non-kitten birthday card suitable to be sent to her sister Charlie, who was currently teaching tourists to scuba dive somewhere off the coast of Australia.
Card in hand, she stood in a frozen queue next to a girl in school uniform carrying a tuba case, while a little old lady argued vehemently with a hapless shop assistant, a spotty faced youth whose name badge said “Hello, my name is Tom”.
The girl was obviously there with the little old lady, and just as obviously was mortified by her behaviour.
Hello-my-name-is-Tom was getting absolutely nowhere in this particular conversation, as he simply could not get a word in edgeways into the little old lady’s harangue.
The conversation went around in circles:
“I know you’ve had it in your bookshop – don’t deny it!”
“I’m not...” protested Hello-my-name-is-Tom.
“Because I’ve talked to the publishers, and believe me they are in so much trouble! But they had a list of book distributors and the book distributors had a list of shops, and your shop was on it.”
“But...”
“Don’t you but me, young man! I have a list! And your shop’s on it!”
Sure enough, she had a piece of paper grasped tightly in her wrinkled fingers. In her other hand was a cane which she brandished for emphasis. The cane was ebony, with a silver handle that looked a bit like a bent cucumber.
“But...” said Hello-my-name-is-Tom in a tone of increasing desperation.
“So I know you had a copy and I’ve been through every inch of this shop and I know it’s not here! I want you to tell me who bought it! Otherwise I’ll get the lawyers on you, see if I don’t! I know my rights!”
“But...” said Hello-my-name-is-Tom, looking like he was going to burst into tears at any moment.
The queue behind the little old lady was growing, and getting restless. Morwen checked her watch anxiously – she had to get back to work soon.
“Tell me who bought the book!” the little old lady yelled at him.
“But I don’t know! Hello-my-name-is-Tom wailed, and he frantically stabbed at a buzzer behind the cash desk.
The little old lady pursed her lips and looked disapproving.
“Well,” she said in tones of profound disappointment. “If you can’t tell me, I demand to speak to someone who can!”
Hello-my-name-is-Tom took a deep breath, and looked over her shoulder.
“Here comes my manager now, ma’am” he said in tones of profound relief.
The queue surged forward as the little old lady was taken to one side by the manager, where she continued her harangue. The manager looked tired, and was looking even more so with each word that came out of her mouth.
Morwen reached the front of the queue just as the manager was explaining patiently and repeatedly to the little old lady that no, he couldn’t tell her who had bought a particular book, because they didn’t keep those sorts of records, and even if he had CCTV, he wouldn’t be able to show it to her without a police request. And, with a touch of steel in his voice, he asked her to please calm down, otherwise he’d have to call the police to report a breach of the peace.
Morwen exchanged wan smiles with Hello-my-name-is-Tom as he beeped her card and handed over her change. As she turned away from the counter, she was knocked into and nearly sent sprawling by the little old lady, who was storming out of the shop, muttering to herself.
“Young people today!” said the little old lady on her way out the door. “Never looking where they’re going! Not able to answer a simple question! Ha!”
The young girl with the tuba case mumbled “sorry” as she ran after the little old lady18.
Morwen frowned, picked up the card from where it had fallen on the ground and rubbed her shoulder. The little old lady had been surprisingly strong and compact.
“How rude!” she said to herself.
Her phone yodelled. It was a text from Richard.
“Movie tonight? X”
Outside the shop a street performer wearing a rabbit costume was cycling on a unicycle and blowing bubbles. Morwen chucked a handful of coins in the hat lying on the ground in front of the performer, and went back to work.
___
18 From the shadowy recesses underneath the bottom shelf, a small, curved figure watched her go.
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